My friend's reasoning was that it was better to eat the less desirable part (aka yogurt and cereal) and save the best part (jam) for later. The idea was to amplify the joy of eating the jam by having a purely concentrated dose of it. Also, the enjoyment of the jam would be greater by first eating something less enjoyable, thus making the jam tastier by contrast. A viable option indeed.
For arguments sake, I asked a few questions. Do you dislike the yogurt? The answer, no. Do you dislike the cereal? again, no. Hmm.. Interesting. While I don't disagree with the notion of pleasure delaying (I do this myself all the time, from cheat days, to periodic fasting), it sparked a sliver of thought in my mind. Another question arose, Why deprive yourself of the joy of experiencing the yogurt and cereal just for the illusion of sweet jammy goodness. In reality, the yogurt, jam, and cereal was placed together for a reason. It works. The combination of those ingredients are greater than the sum of its parts. 1+1+1 doesn't equal 3, it equals 10. Your Net Happiness is higher when you combine things that make a greater whole. The jam sweetens the yogurt, the yogurt adds creaminess to the jam, and the cereal crunches the whole thing up and adds volume. Boom! A holistic experience of jammy, yogurty, crunchy goodness!
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| Seriously, whats NOT to like about any of this? |
If you have read this far, I salute you, but if you haven't yet asked yourself what the hell I'm talking about then I question your sanity. Truly, I'm rambling, but bear with me. What this yogurt analogy taught me is that life is not always merely a series of work or play, suffering or pleasure situations; Where the goal is to get through the bad bits to experience the good.
Firstly, the apparent "bad bits" may not be as bad as you think. Yogurt is good, but when cast in the shadow of jam's goodness seems bad in comparison. Working out is hard and painful, but the joy of movement is something you miss when you are sick or injured. Yes, there are people richer, stronger, and more successful than you, but there are also those who aren't. Don't demonize things that are essentially not bad.
When you actually do face something that is considered suffering, don't suppress it. Feel it. Experience it. Don't fast forward your awareness to a point where you experience pleasure, for it is only through suffering that we can know joy. Khalil Gibran probably sums things up better than I ever can:
Is not the cup that holds your wine the very
cup that was burned in the potter's oven?
And is not the lute that soothes your
spirit, the very wood that was hollowed
with knives?
When you are joyous, look deep into
your heart and you shall find it is only that
which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy.
When you are sorrowful look again in
your heart, and you shall see that in truth
you are weeping for that which has been
your delight.
Some of you say, "Joy is greater than
sorrow," and others say, "Nay, sorrow is
the greater.
But I say unto you, they are inseparable.
Live each moment, good or bad, and be present, for all we have is this moment. Today, a cup of yogurt taught me something about life. Tomorrow, something else will. As big and wonderful as life can be, it's still made up of small moments. Each can teach you something, if you only make the effort to see. So, give it a try..
It's easier than you think.
